Consider the Lilies..: Tuesday..   

Sep 22, 2015


Clay is home :)
He called me on his work phone the day before he left Africa to tell me that as he was leaving a grocery store someone picked his pocket and stole his new iPhone 6plus. Dang it.  It was insured so I was able to get him a new phone that was delivered yesterday but we had to pay the deductible. 
Then while he was asleep on the plane, someone stole his laptop out of his carry on bag!  Needless to say, he was a little ticked when he got off the plane. 

But once he had showered and changed and sat down for dinner with his 'daja' his mood improved :)

We stopped by Elaine's yesterday so Clay could look at her house and see what he could fix, then went to Menards to get everything he needs to do some wiring and to fix some stuff in the Evelyn's room and Savannah's room.  After Elaine drops off a key we are going to go over there while she is at work and fix stuff :)  Well, he is going to fix stuff, I'm going to work on school stuff..
Perspective is a funny thing; when I went to look at her house for the first time I almost cried. I thought it was horrible. But when Clay looked at it for the first time he saw potential.   He's looking forward to all the improvements he can make.
Elaine had done a really good job making it all cozy and comfortable too..

I joined a women's Bible study group at church.  Did I mention that we finally landed at a church?  It's not the little baptist church we thought we had decided on, I can't remember if I blogged about that or not.  We were all set to join but then after talking to the pastor we realized that there were a couple of stipulations that we couldn't be comfortable with so we settled on Omaha Bible Church. 
Anyway, the bible study. I think it's supposed to last all through fall. I have no complaints about the study itself, well maybe a little one; it's a little basic but it's all right. But after the first meeting two weeks ago I knew that I wasn't going to enjoy it.  I don't know why I thought I would. 
But it's my own fault really. 

The truth is, I don't like group activities. At least not church group activities..
I didn't like them from the moment I went to my very first group activity five years ago.  And yet I continued to go to them. 
Connect groups, life groups, women's bible studies, prayer meetings, none of them. 
I would go because for some stupid reason I had it in my head that's what I was supposed to do.  Being a Christian and going to church meant getting involved, being together with other believers, "fellowshipping". 
Heck, the Bible says that we should gather together with other believers to worship and hear the Word of God right?  So it was an obedience thing..
Buuuuut... Isn't that what we do at church on Sundays?  
Yeah..  It is..
So why do I continue to go?  Why do I sign up for these things knowing that I am going to hate every minute of it?  Well, like I said, because I figured that was just something I was supposed to do..  I am a Christian woman and Christian women join things..
Plus whenever I did complain to someone about how much I was not enjoying any of these group things, the usual reply was "Just give it a chance, give it one more try, just stick it out and you will see that you really do enjoy it..  You need to do this, it'll be good for you.  You need to be around more people. Just think about what you can bring to the table!"

Then last week while I was working on the homework for the Bible study, Clay called..  I was going on and on about how I hated it, how I had yet again put myself at a table with a dozen other women who actually wanted to be there and wanted to share their experiences and emotions and struggles with each other (yuck) and how I was pretty darn near to pulling my hair out when he asked "so why do you go these things if you hate them so much?" 
Me: "Because I'm supposed to!"
Him: "Says who?"
Me: "um..."
Yeah..  No one..  There is no rule that says I have to do this stuff!  In fact lots of women don't..  Sure some women would probably like to but can't because they work or something, but I'm sure there are lots of women who don't because they simply don't want to..
So then I texted my sister and asked her how long does she do stuff like this at her church before she decides whether she likes it or not..  She said "about a week"  So I asked her "what do you do if you realize that you don't like it?"  She said "I don't go".

So here I am, still joining groups..  I'm still participating in this stuff after five years!  I don't look forward to going, in fact I dread it..  I love church, I look forward to church, I even look forward to sitting down with a friend or two once a week or so to talk about church, or the Bible, or our struggles, triumphs, whatever..  But church group activities?  No.  Not at all..  None of them..

You know, I'm a pretty smart person.. But sometimes I can be pretty dumb..

No comments:

Post a Comment

Love your comments! Thanks so much!