Consider the Lilies..: 3. Me and my big mouth..   

Jul 17, 2013

3. Me and my big mouth..

BLOG CHALLENGE #3   - For each of the next three entries describe one thing that has changed about you since you accepted Christ as your Savior.
Things are so busy lately that I am only able to blog here once a week..  Sorry about that..  
So, another thing that has changed about me since I met Jesus..  It's taken a lot of work, a lot of biting my tongue (literally) and a lot of prayer..  You know the kind of prayer I mean; "God why do I keep doing this? Please, please, please make me stop!" but I finally think before I speak..  

Sure, I've blogged about the power of our words, more than once..  Believe me, those blog posts were more lessons for me than anyone else..  I remember that I would become so frustrated with myself when I would realize that once again I had said something without thinking and either hurt myself or someone else..  But more importantly, I know I grieved the Holy Spirit..    I would pray the "Oh God make me stop" prayer over and over..  

Until one day while reading Romans I saw this:
For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.  For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do--this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.  but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me.  What a wretched man I am!
Romans 7:18-24

Paul had the same problem..  He struggled with the same thing more than once too!  But he knew that because he had been saved, God forgave him for his past sins, and would continue to forgive him for future mistakes too!  And because of His son, we are free from the bondage of sin..  But knowing that Paul struggled with the same things that I did made me realize that everyone is a work in progress..  I was so busy getting angry at myself for doing it, and praying that God make me stop doing it, that I never took the time to allow the Spirit to do this work in me..

Several times Jesus tells His disciples that He will be sending them a comforter, a helper..  The why is simple .  Because God knows that we can't live a righteous life on our own..  We simply can not turn away from sin without help..  
So that's what I did..  I asked for help..  I didn't just pray "God, make me stop!" if He did, would I actually learn anything?  
So every day (several times a day) I asked the Spirit to teach me..  Remind me of His presence, convict me when I speak, and I even asked Him to show me my behavior in other people so I could see for myself what my own behavior looked like..  It was a lesson, that's for sure!

I began to hear things from people that I never really paid attention to before..  Things that at first seemed harmless but actually were not..  Someone would say something about someone else in passing and I would ask myself (or rather the voice inside would ask) "Was that life giving?  Did what she say glorify God?  Would it have hurt that person if she heard it?"  and then the last question "Why did she say that?"

It wasn't long after that I was asking myself these same questions about the things that I said..  Did it bring life?  Did my words make a difference in a good way?  Did they lift someone up?  Did my words glorify God?  Why did I say it?

When I would read, verses about my words would stand out..

The tongue has the power of life and death,

    and those who love it will eat its fruit.

Proverbs 18:21

But the things that come out of a person’s mouth come from the heart, and these defile them.
Matthew 15:18

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
Ephesians 4:29

There are about a bazillion more but you get my point..  
So I changed..  Just like that..  I stopped saying things just because I felt they needed to be said..  I stopped telling it like it is because it really wasn't my place to do so..  Seriously, who cares anyway?  Come on, we have all done it..  "it was the truth and it needed to be said"..  Right?
You know what that is?  Pride..  It's not our responsibility to set someone straight..  That's God's job..  Not to mention, what if our truth is wrong?  But we get offended, sometimes when it isn't even our business, and we just have to set that person straight!  

But that's not really true..  We don't have to..  We want to..
We want to have the last word..  We want that other person to know how wrong they are and truthfully, how right we are..  And even if we know we are right; without a shadow of a doubt, is it really our place to push it at someone else?  I promise you, if they don't want to listen to you and receive correction, they won't..  It doesn't matter how right you are..  They simply won't..  And all you managed to do was come off as an overbearing know-it-all..  Been there, done that..

Now I'm changed..  At least in this area..  I don't say exactly what I think whenever I think it..  Even when I'm asked for my opinion, I think carefully about how and if I am going to give it..  I don't argue back or defend myself if confronted with someone else who just has to tell me "the truth"..  Because, to put it simply; I really don't care..  Of course, I prayed over and over for a healthy dose of  'I don't care what you think of me'  and I'm seeing the fruit of that, so to speak..  I don't care if they think 'they won' or 'had the last word', I don't care what they think at all, or even what they say about me to someone else because I have learned (the hard way) that it takes more strength not to fight back..

This attitude has changed how I relate to everyone; my husband, my daughter, friends, strangers, and God..
It's funny how most of the time you don't realize you are in bondage to something until you are set free of it..  I was in bondage to my own big mouth..  
And now I'm not..  It's that simple..
It's an amazing feeling :)

Linking up with


  1. Oh tell me about it Ren! That ongoing battle between our spirit man and flesh! Thank God for His sweet Holy Spirit...for without Him, how could we possibly make it? I shudder at the thought! Thanks so much for sharing this Ren and thanks for linking up my friend! Have a wonderful rest of your week!

    1. How could we possibly make it indeed!

  2. Ren, this is a wonderful post. The battle is real and when we acknowledge it, we become more equip to "deal" with it. Some of us may not say the "evil" things, but we surely may "think" it. And, sin is sin whether open or hidden. I think we will always have battle to deal with, until we leave this earth. Blessings!

    1. You are absolutely right. Guarding our thoughts is just as important as guarding our words. :)

  3. Ren, it seems you and I are on similar pages today. :) I like what you wrote about how we think we "need" to speak the truth, but really we just "want" to. I know I've often been guilty of trying to play the role of Holy Spirit, especially with those closest to me. You are completely right in saying that this is Pride at work within us, and probably a measure of self-righteousness, too. Like you, I'm learning more and more that "telling it like it is" is just an excuse to do things my way. It's better to trust the Lord to do His own work. Great post! :)

    1. Trying to play the re if the Holy Spirit. I love how you put that. Spot on!

  4. Great post. It's a constant battle that if we're not careful, we'll get caught up using our tongue for death, not life.

  5. This is a great post...Although I have to admit, I usually have the opposite problem. I don't always speak up when I should.

    Just started following you on Bloglovin.


    1. Thank you., I'm following you too :)


Love your comments! Thanks so much!